Blog Thirty Eight
5.34 hours running time,
5:59 total time
My first ever marathon
29.6 miles in total as slightly miscalculated route.
I so enjoyed running for the wonderful Royal Free Charity who met me at regular points to cheer me on and check I was ok, provided support and food and got me back to my hotel. And huge thanks to Sarah who cycled alongside all the way in the cold and rain , and Robin who has advocated for me all week with the hospital in Bridgend when I was struggling and today provided support with Diane and Tanya from the charity by bringing drinks/blankets/food/encouragement/took photos and generally were there throughout. Finally my neurologist Heather Angus Leppan who has told me to focus on what I can do not what I can’t. Without your help I would never have done this.
Two days ago I was told I couldn’t be discharged from hospital as wasn’t well enough as was having multiple seizures - was told they would use lack of capacity to keep me in. I managed to discharge myself as it was the best option for me (not just for the marathon) and today I ran 29.6 miles. I started running in January intending to get to 5K and today I ran 29.6 miles (and honestly ran more than I walked which was unexpected!).
I can only give full credit to those who have encouraged, supported and pushed me through life to keep trying, to not give up when it’s hard, and to know you always have more. My coaches in gymnastics and trampolining I definitely heard their voices at mile 23 when it hurt, when I was tired wet and cold - the voices that said “you can always give more, think how you will feel if you give up now”. I didn’t think I could actually do this but today I proved that mentally I am strong enough to overcome physical problems. The same from my family who have taught me that life isnt easy or fair, that there is no point in making excuses or finding the easy way as you will never be fully happy that way.
And another huge thanks to my friend across the pond, Kim Westrich Zustiak who encouraged me that running was not impossible with epilepsy, provided me with what was clearly a very successful training plan and has kept encouraging me even through the huge difficulties that she and others are having in the US. She inspired me to run the miles, taking the elite plan not the easy beginner one, to run through no matter what the weather or the terrain. This became so necessary today when it was windy, raining and full of hills. I was so grateful for the push to get out, and stay out of my comfort zone. I know from experience that it is only by doing this that you grow as a person and achieve more, but in a sport when you spend the majority of time training on your own, having to motivate yourself this can be the hardest thing to do.
After everything that has happened over then last 6 months I really needed this to be a success, as the training has been the one thing at times that kept me going. I’m so thankful to all my friends, old and new, from life, trampolining and of course FORDY RUNS who constantly messaged to check I was ok and to push me on.
Barnet hospital to Chase farm to the Royal Free. And an extra few miles to 29.6 in total. I am so grateful to everyone who supported me. I can’t believe I did it. Definitely a team effort. Today “I Iived my best life”
And tomorrow I start my masters degree. Time to engage brain!! It’s been a mad few weeks. I hope it doesn’t stop tbh as it’s what keeps me going.
Major plus - my make up and glitter stayed on. And I got a unicorn balloon and a T-shirt and hoody in purple. My life is complete (yes for all the hard exterior I love pink/purple, glitter and unicorns). I am genuinely so happy - but it was made more happy by the amount of friends this journey has brought so far - both old and new.
This is not the end, this is only the start. I wil continue to run, to race. I have so many events planned for next year and this Blog does not end here, as my journey doesnt end here. I will reach the 10,000 fundraising mark for Epilepsy Research.
Today at 23 miles I seriously questioned why I run. It hurt so much. I was so so tired. It was raining, cold and I had rolled my ankle three times. But at 29 miles I realised why. We go through life always wondering “am I enough”.
As a coach it’s the question we are always trying to get those we coach to answer for themselves. Today my fantastic supporters: all those physically with me, everyone who has been encouraging me through training and general life events and everyone who has coached and advised in the past became those coaches.
Today I proved to myself that despite wind, rain, days in hospital, I didn’t let anyone down.
I was, for once, enough.
I just hope that sometimes I can pass some of that feeling onto those I coach.
Love you all x x x